The screwdriver slipped again, embedding itself in the oak floor like a disgruntled insect. Jordan stared at the half-assembled bookshelf, its legs splayed like a drunk kangaroo. ‘Just one more screw,’ they muttered, though the instructions clearly stated, ‘Do not…
Lila stared at her phone, fingers twitching like she’d just been handed a live wire. The app’s algorithm had gifted her a TikTok dance challenge called #RenegadeRumble, which apparently required ‘synchronizing with a 90s rap track while pretending you’re a…
Gary, a TikTok-obsessed millennial, moved to Bumblefuck, Nebraska, thinking he’d strike gold with trends. He opened a YouTube channel called “GaryGoesViral” and posted a 15-second dance to “Renegade” in a Walmart parking lot. The video got 3 likes. Undeterred, he…
Gary stared at his reflection, muttering, “I am confident.” He strutted into the office, only to trip over a rug. “I am graceful!” he yelled, falling into a filing cabinet. His boss peered out. “Gary, are you okay?” “I am……
Gary muttered ‘I am capable’ during the meeting, fingers drumming like a drum solo. His team traded glances as he escalated. ‘I am brilliant!’ he bellowed, knocking over a water glass. The room froze. ‘I AM A POSITIVE FORCE OF…