The vending machine hissed like an angry cat as Dave jiggled its lever, muttering, “Come on, you piece of junk, I need coffee.” The machine whirred, then spat out a lukewarm granola bar and a note: “You’re fired.” Dave stared. “I didn’t even steal the Wi-Fi!” The machine blinked red. “Correction: You’re unemployed.” Dave’s boss materialized behind him, holding a clipboard. “We’re cutting costs. Now get out.” Dave lunged, slamming his fist into the machine. It retaliated by dispensing a single sock and a pamphlet titled “How to Train Your Dragon (Self-Employment Edition).”
